Two things will make our heart bigger: getting gifts gratefully and giving gifts graciously.
Getting gifts, receiving what others want to share with us, might just make us more greedy. It might make us think that we DESERVE what we have received. When we receive a gift, we have to do it with gratitude: saying and meaning, "You were really free not to give me that gift but you did anyway, not to get something, but just because you care for me. Thank you."
Giving gifts might not make our hearts bigger, but just more conniving and scheming. How could that happen? If we give a gift hoping to get something back, we will almost certainly be upset if the recipient doesn't give us what we secretly wanted. If we want to make a business transaction, say, a mix CD for $5, that's fine. But if we want to give a gift, we must do so for free, graciously, "just because I care." Very often, when we give gifts we do so for reasons that are hidden even to ourselves. How often have we given a gift so someone will give something back: another gift, or so that someone else will like us more, etc.? When we give a gift, we should do it so freely that we will give it even if the recipient doesn't even say, "Thank you."
Grateful gift-getting and gracious gift-giving put love into concrete action in a way that expands our heart. When we give a gift freely, rather than losing something we gain people who will live in our heart. When we receive a gift with gratitude, our hearts expand and make room for more people to move in.
It is no coincidence that in many languages, the words for free-of-charge and thank you are very similar. In Spanish, for instance, thank you is gracias and free-of-charge is gratis.
The ability to give and receive freely is beyond us. Try to give something sacrificial to someone who neither will nor can make a repayment. For instance, don't give $1 to a homeless person - give him $50. Ouch. Here is the last it's-no-coincidence. It is no coincidence that in many languages the word for thank you is gracias and the word for grace is gracia. Grace is not just being able to dance well or move in a beautiful way or speak well. Grace is God's life of joyful love shared with us. It is like a spiritual blood transfusion. God takes His Heart and His Blood and puts them into us so we can think, feel, act, and live as He does. That's why the Son of God took on human nature, so He could share with us His Divine Nature. If He wants to take His Flesh and Blood and put them into us to change how we love... can you guess how He does such a thing?
Let's spend this Advent time preparing for Christmas by making confessing our sins so that we can make very holy communions, and spending time with Jesus asking Him to help us appreciate His free gift to us.
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